Geek Love Pt. 2

geeklove

Why, oh why, is there a part two?

Well, geek met not-so geek and fell in love. Said geek (Me!) hasn’t been happier or more in love in her entire life.

Let me take this back ten months so that my later point makes more sense.

I met Ricky through an online dating website, and it’s really interesting how we first got in contact with each other. I was online browsing profiles when I came across Ricky. Initially I thought he was very attractive, but soon discovered from his “About Me” section that he was into salsa dancing, soccer, and played bass in a salsa band in the cultured big city of Austin, TX. Right away I was disappointed. There was no way this attractive cultured man would be interested in a geeky girl who played video games and went through a thick novel in the matter of a couple of days. So I clicked the “Meet Him” option that indicated that I’d like to meet him, but didn’t message him. I felt as though I already knew the response or the possible lack thereof.

I wandered on and off the site for an hour or so before I saw that I had a new message. From Ricky. I was genuinely surprised. In the message, he said hello and challenged me to answer some really random yet thought provoking questions. One of them was, “If you were alone at night in any city, what city would it be and why?” I found this message so much more engaging than the “Hi, how r u? Ur pretty” messages that I frequently got. I was intrigued!

The messages continued that night led to text messaging and those led to phone calls. I was finding out that he was much more than what he seemed and we were instantaneously drawn to each other. Those phone calls continued for a week before we set up our first date.

Needless to say, we hit it off despite the differences in our interests. Here is where I will admit that I was wrong in the way that I presented this topic to begin with.

I stated that geeks should date geeks in my original post. I was convinced there could be no other way. I do believe that this is still partially true, but there was one major difference.

 

geek

noun\ˈgēk\

: a person who is socially awkward and unpopular : a usually intelligent person who does not fit in with other people

: a person who is very interested in and knows a lot about a particular field or activity

 

This blog serves the purpose of revealing to others that geeks aren’t always socially awkward or unpopular. However, the second definition always holds true.

In that regard, a geek should date another geek. By that I mean, a person who is very passionate about one or more subjects should date someone who is the same way. The major correction I’m making to my initial blog is this: The subjects that each geek is passionate about need not be the same!

After ten months in a loving happy relationship with someone who hardly plays games, reads, or indulges in the purchasing of one too many geeky t-shirts, I’ve found that the most important thing is that we can relate to each other’s passions because we have our own. We also respect each other for being passionate no matter what it’s about. The icing on the cake is our equal openness to trying and experiencing new things; particularly what the other is passionate about.

Don’t get me wrong though; there are both sides to this coin. Some people are so closed minded that they unconsciously require their s/o to be into the exact same things. However, it doesn’t have to be a problem that she doesn’t play Black Ops or that he doesn’t want to read steamy romance novels. As long as two people can keep an open mind and understand the passion his/her significant other has for one or more subjects.

Personally, I think geeks have some of the best understanding of passions hence why geeks should date geeks.

In the past ten months, I have turned into a big FC Barcelona fan from watching the games with Ricky when I’ve never watched soccer before in my life. At the same time, Ricky has admitted to being a fan of Harry Potter after he reluctantly agreed to watch all of the movies with me for the first time. I may not be ready to purchase each year’s Barca jersey and he may not be interested in reading the bulk that is H.P. but we were open minded and found these new interests through each other.

So there it is. I stand corrected, albeit partially corrected but still!

 

~ Britney

 

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Geek Love

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Geeks and their relationships are something that I’ve mulled over quite a bit. Being a geek and also not so geeky has allowed me to date a lot of different types of guys. I’ve dated a lot of guys with different interests, hobbies, and lifestyles. This has led me to a particular conclusion.

Geeks should date geeks.

At the very least they should date those who are partially geeky in some sense. Being a geek really is a lifestyle choice. Your hobbies are generally a huge part of your life, and so it is best to be with someone that can at least relate to that or is into the same things.

I have successfully been in a relationship with someone who was very barely geeky. It was nice and I was happy for a time, but in the long run I found that we didn’t relate on a pretty large part of my life.

Think of an individual that is very much into fitness. They spend a good deal of their time and days going to the gym, biking, or running. They would most certainly need to be with someone that could relate to that, if not go out and exercise with them. It is a lifestyle choice that takes up time, and could potentially separate them from a partner that isn’t so much into fitness. I believe the same thing applies to geeks.

I’m sure us geeks have all been in that situation. You’re seeing someone. Sure, they’re attractive and so nice, but when you reference one of your favorite books, games, or movies they just don’t get the joke. Their eyes glaze over as they just blatantly stare at you wondering what in the world you’re talking about. You laugh it off and move on usually, but what it weren’t like that? What if the person lit up, understood, and could make a remark right back? That’s just something else.  🙂

Let me know what you think of my theory! I’m sure it doesn’t apply to all geeks, and there just might be partners out there that can accept the geekier side of a person. For me, however, I most definitely need to date someone who can relate to many parts of my personality and life.

 

Britney